This phrase was mentioned to me by someone in my travels this summer as she was sharing the challenges with someone in her life. The phrase has stuck with me and I’ve pondered it often. It’s really a wonderful question to ask yourself. Questions are the key to being willing to inspect our own lives. This question, ‘Are you Creating Calm or Chaos?’ is a powerful one.
Am I Creating Chaos?
When I first asked myself this question, I realized there was an area of my life that I was creating the chaos. This was a bit of a surprise to me as I’m someone who spends most of my time trying to eliminate chaos. I am good at bringing calm to a chaotic situation and bringing order to chaos. People have often commented that it’s one of my strengths. Yet, in asking the question of myself, I realized that there are times that I’m the one responsible for the chaos.
It turns out that one of my strengths which is asking questions to understand can also be a weakness when it creates chaos. Sometimes I ask too many questions and spend too much time analyzing and digging in with people. When I do this, I realize that I’m creating chaos and stirring something up that doesn’t really add any value. Ultimately, I’m trying to be right and that doesn’t allow me to remain calm. Sometimes I just need to let things go. When I don’t let them go and I keep asking questions at the wrong time or in the wrong way, the questions aren’t helpful. They aren’t creating calm, they are creating chaos.
Now, when I realize that I’m creating the chaos, whether it be my questions or some other moment that I’ve done something that is part of the problem and not the solution, this phrase seems to pop into my mind. It gets easier with practice to notice our own behaviors and actions.
When Others Create Chaos It’s Not My Job to Fix It
I also have some people in my life that have a special ability to create and live in chaos, I jump into fix-it mode. While it’s often easier to fix it for them, it isn’t helping them learn to know themselves better. As a result, they aren’t learning to create calm because they have become comfortable with the chaos. They aren’t happy with the chaos, it’s just what they know and that’s OK. It’s not that chaos is bad, it’s just that it affects others and keeps us from being centered within ourselves. When our minds and our environments and our relationships are chaotic, it doesn’t feel good.
How to Create Calm in Chaos
Step 1. Notice the feeling. If you find yourself in chaos, notice how it feels in your body and then ask that feeling what it wants. Often the feeling has a message for us. If you notice that someone else is in chaos, ask them how it feels. See if you can get them to notice the feeling.
Step 2. Acknowledge the feeling and love it. We first need to transform the feeling by loving it. Love transforms the situation and the feeling into safety. Once we feel safe, then we can look at what needs healed. Imagine that you are holding the feeling in your hands. Notice it’s size and shape and color. Notice how big or small it is. Once you have a sense of it, simply surround it with love. This helps you to see and experience the feeling outside of your body rather that inside your body.
Step 3. Ask what needs healed. We are all our own healers and we can help others heal every day by creating safety and asking the question. It might be an old memory, frustration with a friend, feeling left out, a bad dream, a flash from a past life or even just waking up late. Sometimes it will be the smallest of things or a pattern that seems to repeat itself. Any of it is OK. Just allow it to be in your consciousness or the consciousness of the person that you are interacting with. If you find the energy is stuck or won’t shift, reach out to some of the healers here in the Initiates Community. Patterns that seem stuck often need some extra nudges of support from others.
This journey of humanity is asking us to step forward and grow. Ask yourself questions and discover your calm in the chaos.